Friday, March 12, 2010

Les Misérfatles

Dear Fat,

I was eating ice cream so quickly today that I inhaled some and started choking.  This was karmic retribution for which of the following?

A) Not having exercised since last Tuesday
B) Eating more this past week than necessary for 3-30 human beings
C) Not updating this blog
D) Being a terrible person on the inside
E) All of the above

If you learned anything about multiple-choice questions in your K-12 education, you know that the answer is most likely E.  You are correct.

Actually, my karmic retribution this past week was probably my own MIOUOBMD, minus the BMD (see As I Lay Fattening).  Seriously, there was no nasal congestion.  My throat wasn't swollen.  My sinuses were clear, my head felt fine, my mucus was clear.  But the mucus was there, especially in the mornings with the overnight buildup.  My chain-smoker voice subsided only yesterday.  The coughing is still there.

I hope to make a full recovery by Sunday to take up jogging again.

Making my comeback,

I.M.

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