Sunday, November 07, 2010

The Fattest Eye

Dear Fat,

Looking at photos from a few years back makes me uncomfortable.  Perhaps memory deceives me, but I don't remember thinking that I looked particularly fat.  I knew it, but if we're going by feeling alone, I don't feel any different right now than I did then.  Yet I am about twenty pounds lighter than I was when at my peak poundage.  I can better see the difference now when people go up or down by a few pounds . . . but I'm not entirely sure it's an ability I'd like to have.

I used to think calorie-counting people were just on the downward slope towards getting an eating disorder.  This is probably still true, but as I am trying to get rid of a different eating disorder, I'll try my best not to slide too far towards the other side of the spectrum.

Only 5 days left until our first Fattiversary.  Thankfully, the pounds are finally starting to come off, but it has taken a lot longer than I expected.  Did we set our goals too high?  Was the allure of all things delicious too strong for us to ignore?

Yesterday was a dietary failure . . . today, there will be jogging.  There will, there will, there will.

Losing 0.8 pound before Friday,

I.M.

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